RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN PSYCHO-SOCIAL VARIABLES AND MARITAL ADJUSTMENT AMONG WOMEN IN FEDERAL COLLEGE OF EDUCATION
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- NGN 3000
Background to the Study
The importance of marital adjustment cannot be over-emphasized; the adjustment of each marriage or family is eventually the growth of the nation at large. Marital adjustment as referred to in this study as individual‟s subjective experience of marriage in terms of how their needs will be met, and how the individual‟s expectations and desires are to be satisfied. In addition satisfaction of the needs of each spouse is essential to marital adjustment. Human beings strive for well-being and happiness in various spheres of life, be it personal, social, economic, marital and work. So the achievement and success in these spheres lead to satisfaction in life, whereas inadequacy to do the same may leads to frustration. Therefore, human beings constantly have to adjust to various roles, environmental demands and pressures throughout the course of life. Marriage is purely the highest of all human interaction therefore, must never be entered into carelessly and in marriage couples face challenges in the beginning of marital relationship so they need to adapt and adjust to everyday life and it needs both external and internal adjustments after marriage. External adjustments refer to making adjustments to fulfill the societal demands. Society‟s needs and expectations may conflict with couple‟s need and requirements, whereas, internal adjustments refer to adjusting to different personalities of each other. Marital adjustment is actually the adjustment to some important matters of life. Marriage consists of a life of effort and concern, felicitation and melancholy, illness and health. It consists of being young and becoming old, dealing with small and big problems, coping with internal and external hardships and threats. A lot of days, weeks, months, and years are lived jointly. During this lengthy phase, 2 the couple lives together in proximity, which unveils all. It soon become clear that big things can matter very little while small things can become awfully big, often over a small matter a great dispute arises up. Marriage can explain how any person can be awfully small, mistakes and shortcomings or deficiencies are visible in marriage. According to Ramcharan (2008), there are two elements in marriage. One is bodily (sexual, wish) and the other one is divine (love, respect and adore). Towards the end of life both elements are coming closer and closer and at a particular point of time the later aspect (love, respect, and adore) becomes evident. A well-adjusted couple has consensus on financial matters and most importantly how to deal with in-laws. The couple has to change its‟ preferences, interests, and aims of life so as to share love, and give confidence to each other and as a result of these adjustments they either reduce or stop complaining about their marriage (Jalil & Muazzam, 2013). Marital adjustment has long been a trendy topic in studies of the family, most likely because the idea is supposed to be narrowly associated to the stability of any marriage. Marital adjustment is a process which is created during couples‟ life because it is necessary for taste conformity, person‟s traits recognition, behavioral rules creation and relational models formation. Thus, marital adjustment is an evolutional process between a couple (Aminjafari, Padash, Baghban & Abedi 2012). Marital adjustment is not only a value term, but also a relative term. It implies firmness and strength to endure under hard as well as easy circumstances. Marriage and family problems represent a unique but common, category of adjustment difficulty that causes people to seek psychological treatment. Problems can develop in a couple‟s relationships because of a medical 3 or psychological problem in either person, or in one of their children. Parent-child problems can also create problems within the marriage. (Aminjafari, Padash, Baghban & Abedi 2012). In the present modern era, professionals like bank employees and doctors have to spend more time at their work place and are more indulge in activities related to their career and professions. They may have less time to fulfill their family responsibilities which may lead to dissatisfaction. in which marital maladjustments are the consequences of dissatisfaction. (Shikha, Darshan & Kavita, 2013). One definition of adjustment is adaptation behavior that permits us to meet the demand of the environment (Kalpana Bharambe & Pravin, 2013). Marriage is by far the most important personal relationship for any person and has been described as the most intimate, delicate and far reaching relationship between man and woman. The stability and continuity of a marriage is important not just to the members of the marital dyad, but to their family and community as a whole. Marital adjustment is a process which is created during couples‟ life because it is necessary for taste conformity, person‟s traits recognition, behavioral rules creation and relational models formation. Thus, marital adjustment is an evolutional process between couples (Aminjafari, Padash, Baghban & Abedi 2012). It is an adaptation between husband and wife to a point where there is companionship, agreement on basic values, affectionate intimacy and accommodation. In other words, a well adjusted marriage involves a relationship in which the attitudes and actions of each of the couple produce an environment which is highly favourable to the proper functioning of the personality structures of the couple especially in areas of primary relations. In this case they would have come to an adjustment of interest, objectives and values, by which they are in harmony, in demonstrations of affection, sharing confidences and having fewer or no serious complaints about their marriage. Soon after marriage, the period of marital 4 adjustment begins which is a very trying period when the couple is faced with reality of each other‟s way of life. Psycho-social referred to as both psychological and social aspects of individual adjustment in marriage such as in-laws‟ interference, suspicion, love and communication. Inlaws are relatives by marriage, especially the parents of the husband or wife. In-laws are generally perceived as “enemies” by some couples. They are usually regarded as unnecessary interference in the scheme of things. Except in a few cases, many couples would rather keep their in-laws at arm‟s length because they believed too much familiarity brings contempt. But, as much as many couples would want to do this, the extended family practice by African culture may not permit it. Women especially, suffer the major consequence of in-laws‟ interference in their marriage because in-laws see them as intruders who deprive them of the love and attention needed from their son. (Wayas, 2015). Another variable of psycho-social is suspicion. Suspicion could be used interchangeably with cheating, jealousy, distrust, mistrust and doubt. Suspicion which is an act of suspecting; the imagination or apprehension of the existence of doubt (especially something wrong or hurtful) without proof, or upon very slight evidence, or upon no evidence. Suspicion has deprived a large number of people their joy and peace; it has even led to cases of battering, divorce, murder and so on. (Sneh, 2017) Communication is the process of transmitting and receiving ideas, information, and messages. Healthy and poor communication in homes/marriages contributes to the adjustment or maladjustment of such marriage. Communication in marriage is vital to a happy marriage and family life. Without good communication all the marriage adviser/counsellors in the world cannot help rebuild a bad marriage relationship into a good one. It is seen as an important which 5 enables each spouse to express their desires, needs and to treat the other persons in an acceptable way (Drescher, 2000). Married couples with vital relationships are most likely to experience continued, positive interactions within marriage. Those who enjoy spending time together and can confide in each other usually maintain a close and giving relationship as they age. However, those couples who are unsatisfied in the earlier years of their marriage tend to have a negative experience in later life. Their relationships are difficult, their communication conflictual and unrewarding. (Shweta, 2013) Love is another issue that calls for adjustment in marriage as one of the main requirements of marriage; husband and wife should be friendly and show affection to each other. They should have the interest of each other and display kindness, develop positive attitudes towards each other, regard and treat one and other as best friend. Couples should show care, concern and be ready to give as much or more than they receive. They should identify positive qualities and encourage the display of such attributes. Occasionally, they should send notes expressing love and acknowledging that their partners are lovable individuals. Couples should always think of the positive sides of their partners and show admiration rather than condemnation. (Shweta, 2013).
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